Tuesday, September 2, 2008

How to save a buck...

We have a garage that is full of crap (You know I scold my children for using that word - "It's vulgar, it's not nice.") but it accurately describes the contents of my garage - C-R-A-P. So I mention to my dear husband, the ex-Marine, that I would prefer a garage that had some order and could be used instead of a garage that is simply a holding place for trash items too big to fit into our 600 gallon trash bin that gets picked up twice a week. Things like - the old "Turtle" car top carrier that we haven't used in about 14 years, yet has moved with us 4 times. The twin mattress set that is 15 years old and was swapped out for a double by teen daughter, Bookworm, months ago. The cardboard boxes that once housed - the flat screen wall size TV, the steam vacuum, and something else that was big because there are three of them out there! CRAP! CRAP! CRAP! So ex-Marine decides the way to handle the situation is to buy a truck. Oh, no. We are already a three vehicle family with only two licensed drivers. Are we to become a four vehicle family with only two licensed drivers? Oh, hell, no. So I stall him on the truck thing. I go and look at the truck with him. I don't say, "no". I'm like a 1950's housewife figuring out how I can trick him into deciding on his own the truck is a bad idea. Just call me Lucy. I start with the mattress. I enlist Tween's help and we push and shove and shove and push that mattress into the trunk of my HONDA CIVIC - -through the fold down back into the back seat and it only hangs out the back of the trunk a few feet. We haul it to the dump and heave it over the rail into the bulky items bin - mattress GONE! Now the box spring is a different story - there's no mushing and pushing something framed in wood - it has no give. But you shouldn't underestimate the motivation of a woman (just a mom) who doesn't want to add a fourth car payment to the family budget or a fourth vehicle to the family car lot. I got a great big claw hammer and attacked that box spring. I took the outer frame off, removed all the foamy shreddy yuck from inside, and was left with slats attached to metal that could be folded, rolled, however you want to manipulate it -into a small enough bundle to fit into the trunk of a Honda. And it was right at that point that the ex-Marine returned home and found me. So I let him help me take it to the dump and I think I have proven that you don't need a truck in order to clean out the garage. We'll see. If the boxes and the Turtle are still there in a few weeks, I'll be eating crow - nothing that Lucy didn't have to do many times.

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