Saturday, January 2, 2010

December is finally over...


This has been my December, a roller coaster, and it has been a rocky ride. December started out fairly benign with just the usual whirlwind of Christmas concerts for the kids at school, parties for teams and classes and groups of friends, busy but a fun kind of busy.

Then Tween had an accident on his skateboard. He was just goofing around outside on our driveway and fell face first. We spent a day at the hospital getting facial x-rays and stitching up the lip. Then a day at the dentist and then the endodontist to assess the teeth. Verdict was no broken bones (hooray!), pretty cut up lip and mouth (will heal), and teeth are still a question mark (time will tell if they are going to stay put or not). Bad but not too bad.

Then we went to Disney for a weekend to use up the last two days on our five day tickets. We were able to make the trip even with an injured Tween because our dear friends who were going too included the endodontist! So we got to see Disney at Christmas - magical! They even made it "snow" on Main Street using bubbles. Fun, fun, fun - of the exhausting kind!

Our company coming for Christmas changed their plans. Disappointing, of course, but it allowed me on Christmas Day to put everyone back in the car and go to my parents for the weekend. My brothers were also there so my parents had all their children and grandchildren around the table. Both were delighted and my dad choked up with emotion as he gave the blessing. There are few times that we children who are so scattered can all be together so that was a fun day of the emotional kind.

Then came New Year's Eve day. Our company postponed from Christmas arrived and it was all cooking and eating and cooking and eating some more. Then I got the news that my dad, perfectly fine jusy days ago during our visit, had spent the last night in the hospital. He had started coughing up blood. My mother took him to the emergency room and the chest scan showed a large mass in his lungs. Other spots were found along his neck and windpipe. They can't meet with the oncologist until next week but things look grim. What all assume to be cancer has spread so much already that surgery doesn't look like an option but they will meet with a surgeon and get a more definite answer later. You know it is inevitable your parents are going to die but the reality that it may happen sooner rather than later is hard.

So I went and prayed. Our parish has twenty four hour adoration of the Blessed Sacrament. I went to the chapel, got on my knees, and asked God for a miracle. I've always prayed. I have never felt like I got a real answer to my prayers but I pray anyway - that's faith, right? Later that night I went to Mass, the evening vigil Mass for the feast day of the Immaculate Conception. The priest got up to do the homily and he picked as an introduction a talk about a saint, a faithful prayer, who prayed intently and without allowing distraction. That saint shares my dad's somewhat unusual name, Bernard. I can't help but feel that was a sign God heard my prayer. I'm not expecting a miracle because God's plan may be different from my desires, I'm not calling my mom to tell her and get her hopes up. But, I am hopeful and calmed and cheered. God heard me, as unworthy as I am, and chose to respond.

So, good riddance to December 2009, I am glad to be off of that emotional roller coaster. Hello to 2010!

2 comments:

bermudaonion said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your dad, but I'm also thankful that he got to be with his whole family for Christmas. I'll pray for you and your family. Happy New Year.

Beth F said...

I'm sorry about your roller coaster ride but am hoping for betting things in 2010. Happy New Year.