Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Life Strategies by Phil McGraw

From Dr. Phil's webstore: Whether it's a bad relationship, a dead-end career, or a harmful habit, Dr. McGraw's 10 Life Laws will empower you to take responsibility for your own actions and break free from self-destructive patterns. Drawing upon more than fifteen years of experience, Dr. McGraw explores each of the 10 Life Laws necessary to succeed.

I never watch Dr. Phil, I never read Dr. Phil, all I really know about him is that he was once on Oprah. But I was at the bottom of the audiobook barrel and this was what was left. (A situation I have since rectified with two trips to Barnes & Noble and a great win from a blog giveaway.) So I popped in Dr. Phil and started to listen. I had to get past an introduction that just seemed to be a self-aggrandizing "I'm so tight with Oprah" story. After the somewhat snake-oil salesman slimy feeling introduction, he started on his ten life laws.

Life Law #1: You either get it, or you don't.
Life Law #2: You create your own experience.
Life Law #3: People do what works.
Life Law #4: You cannot change what you do not acknowledge.
Life Law #5: Life rewards action.
Life Law #6: There is no reality; only perception.
Life Law #7: Life is managed; it is not cured.
Life Law #8: We teach people how to treat us.
Life Law #9: There is power in forgiveness.
Life Law #10: You have to name it before you can claim it.

It took me awhile to get through the book because my mind kept wandering to my own family and our dynamics and how his life laws applied and before you know it I would have to stop the CD and back up to get on track. I don't necessarily think that was a bad thing; reflection is the intent. I didn't gain any huge insights but a lot of it was kind of "uh-huh, yes, I see that happening" and knowing I am not alone always makes me feel better so that was good. My powers of retention are poor but I did have one nugget stick with me. It was Life Law #8 - We teach people how to treat us. This one spoke to me as a mother. An example, I complain about Tween's towels on the bathroom floor, but I don't call Tween in to clean the mess up. Instead, I clean them up and then complain about it. I am teaching Tween how to treat me and the lesson he is learning is "you'll have to put up with some whining but you can keep doing it". It's not a revelation of dramatic proportions but it is important. I need to acknowledge that I am half of every relationship and if there's a problem, I need to look carefully at my half and see what I am doing!

This book counts toward the 2010 Audiobook Challenge hosted by the bloggers over at Royal Reviews. Click on the button to see my progress.

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