Thursday, January 1, 2009

Solemnity of Mary

Update May 25, 2009. I added this post to the Mary Moments Carnival . Click on the link to read some beautiful, thoughtful posts that are much more scholarly than mine!

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. That simple prayer imploring our Mother for help, asking her to ask her Son to help us, takes on different shades of meaning with every utterance. Not the fundamental meaning - help, help, help - but the kind of help needed. As we sat in church at the Mass on the Solemnity it took on for me a shade of desperation. Tween is such a challenge. Sometimes I feel like I am losing him to something that I can't really define and thus can't confront and do battle with.

The parenting books will tell you that during the middle school years children start to look to their peers for reinforcement more than their parents. They just care more about being cool than about pleasing you - at least in public. But we have always had "safe havens". One of those safe havens was the altar of the Lord. When Tween was being his most ornery, he could still transform when it was time for him to serve. He would put the alb on and make me proud. But today, on Mary's special day, Tween chose the other path. He put the alb on and proceeded to torment his older sister, Bookworm, who was captain of the servers that day. She came to me before the Mass started and asked to have him removed. So I talked to him and asked him, "Do you want to serve today?" and he said no. That was that - one sanctuary that suddenly wasn't the safe haven it was in the past for Tween and myself. As he sat beside me in the pew, I prayed and prayed for help in figuring out how to allow him to be his own person but still help him be a child that is kind to others and respectful of adults. I'm not sure how to do that, Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us.


Karin said...

While I am not a parent, teaching children your son's age for the last 24 years has given me a sympathetic heart for parents- especially around this age.How blessed we are to have Mary to turn to no matter what our state in life. Thank you for sharing and also for your kind comment on my post earlier today.
God Bless!

Tracy said...

I have a tween, too Karin....and I will join together with you praying to Mary for guidance and to be the example of the mother I want to be especially at this difficult time of my son's life....and with 3 more to follow, I will be spending a LOT more time in Adoration with Mary and Jesus!!! God Bless!

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